Don't Know What to Do

Well bollox

Today is the 4th of January, the day I was supposed to start work at Aviva but haven't heard anything. Thinking about it, it does really interest me working there either. I could phone a competitor of where i used to work but that doesn't really interest me either. So i'm a bit stuck in a rut. Nothing interests me at all so I sit on my arse all day doing fuck all. I feel like going back to Spain and working in a bar again, however i'm looking at that thinking it wouldn't be good money and i wouldn't be able to save for a house but I don't know if I want that anymore.

I would like to play poker for a living but I doubt that will happen. It's always in the back of my mind when i'm playing which makes me tilt more when someone calls with 85 and beats my AA (see hand history in last post). It feels like everything is against me sometimes. I feel I know the game well enough to win consistantly, but when you need to win 6/10 to profit and you get the beats I got in the first 3 games then it's actually impossible to win 6/10 and profit.

I'm not sure what games pro players play to be profitable but it can't be double or nothing games such as HU SNG or coolers it really can't. I think i'd be better at 30 or 45 man SNG but on boss the player traffic is too low and I can't add money to another accont, so I might just play MTT or try and break even at HU SNG and put in volume for rakeback.